Reports are that Barack Obama is appointing as Surgeon General that doctor guy on CNN, Sanjay Gupta. By that logic, Michelle Malkin suggests Judge Judy for the next Supreme Court opening.
Comedian Al Franken will likely be the Senator from Minnesota. Kennedy princess Carolyn Kennedy may well be the Senator from New York. We already have a body-builder action-movie star as governor of California.
Maybe we should just turn everything over to the celebrities whom we adore. Some societies have had aristocracy (rule of the “best”) and others have had plutocracy (rule of the rich). We used to have democracy (rule of “the people”) until the people found that boring and an interruption of their entertainment. I think we are ready for celebritocracy (rule of the celebrities).
[That is a new word, as far as I know. Use it and make it spread. It would be the pinnacle of my achievements to add a word to the English language and to get a credit in a future edition of The Oxford English Dictionary. UPDATE: Bob Hunter tells me the word is already out there. Foiled again! FURTHER UPDATE: Others of you are piling on. Stop tormenting me for my failure!]
What other celebrities would you suggest for high government office?
OK, I’ll go first:
(1) Kiefer Sutherland for Director of the CIA. (As Jack Bauer, he would surely know more about espionage than Leon Panetta.)
(2) Sen. Fred Thompson for Attorney General. (He did such a good job at that on Law and Order.)
{ 41 comments… read them below or add one }
To Gupta’s credit, he is a real doctor. He’s been to med school, written for journals, and served as a White House Fellow under Clinton. I think that putting in qualified individuals with some media contacts and savvy is actually a pretty good idea.
But, I like your line of thinking. So, instead of Gupta, I propose John McGinley (Dr. Cox on Scrubs) for SG.
instead of Gupta,my pick would be Hugh Laurie for
Surgeon General, from the tv show House. And for
Sorry, but a Google search of celebritocracy shows others have used it.
Vin Diesel for Homeland Security.
That ShamWow guy, Vince, as Secretary of the Treasurey.
Yeah, sorry to say, but celebritocracy has been around at least since 2005, maybe earlier. You can still be famous for popularizing it! Well, ok, not really..
example from 2005: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0059084/usercomments
That is a new word, as far as I know.”
Did you google the word?
For example, the Washington Post noted “celebritocracy”, with some mock examples for government position, back on October 14, 2003.
And celebritocracy is more like a subset of kakistocracy.
You know what would be hilarious?!? Angelina Jolie as a UN ambassador!! Hahahahahha……oh wait, she already is.
I fear for this country.
Donald Trump for Secretary of Housing and Urban Development.
The fact that ‘celebritocracy’ already existed somewhere on the ether does not negate the originality of thought. Since this is the first place I have heard it, I give you full credit for the idea.
Perhaps in an attempt to relate to the culture, I will even ‘choose to believe’ that you were the first to coin the expression.
Surely that is adequate compensation for your loss of a place in the new Oxford dictionary.
(Upon further reflection, isn’t the Oxford dictionary the one that decided to drop words that have Christian significance, like ’sin’ and ‘disciple?’ Perhaps it is best that you were spared the honor.)
How about Keanu Reeves for Technology Czar?
Create the post of Infrastructure Czar and put Tim Allen in charge.
Kick out Hillary Clinton and put in Harrison Ford. Actually, you could just kick out most everyone and put in Harrison Ford.
Sean Connery – make him president and everyone would swoon over his brogue: instant world peace.
I’m trying to think of where Brittany Spears or Hillary Duff could go, but I can’t think of any skills they have other than posing for and having sex. Maybe ambassadors? As long as the people they are trying to convince are male, they should be great!
For Department of the Interior, how about Ty Pennington? The Dept. of the Interior is in charge of remodeling & interior design, right?
Billy Mays for Secretary of Commerce…BUT WAIT, I’M NOT THROUGH–WE’LL DOUBLE YOUR ORDER! CALL NOW!
Jerry Springer to head up Dept. of Health & Human Services
Judge Judy for Attorney General
Church Norris…for any position he wants
Duties of the Surgeon General
The duties of the Surgeon General are to:
Protect and advance the health of the Nation through educating the public, advocating for effective disease prevention and health promotion programs and activities, and,
providing a highly recognized symbol of national commitment to protecting and improving the public’s health,
Articulate scientifically based health policy analysis and advice to the President and the Secretary of Health and Human Services (HHS) on the full range of critical public health, medical, and health system issues facing the Nation,
Provide leadership in promoting special Departmental health initiatives, e.g., tobacco and HIV prevention efforts, with other governmental and non-governmental entities, both domestically and internationally,
http://www.surgeongeneral.gov/about/duties/index.html
based on how the official govt web site defines his role, he would seem to actually be a brilliant choice.
RECOMMENDATIONS
ronald reagan, actor for president (oh, we already did that one… never mind…)
arnold schwartzenegger, body builder. anatomically correct action figure. terminator. for governor of the largest state in the union.
sarah palin. beauty queen. sports newscaster. for vice president of the united states and governor of alaska. Hey I liked the bathing suit segment walk and poses and especially the flute solo.
Fred Thomson. actor. for US senator.
Sonny bono. singer/songwriter for senator.
hmmmm. I am trying to think of a democrat who falls neatly into this class. I am stumped. anyone here who can help me identify democratic entertainers besides Al Franken who qualify for government office because of their star qualities?
William Shatner for Attorney General (Denny Crane)
If Dr. Cox is the Surgeon General, Dr. House could head up the CDC or Health and Human Services.
Russell Crowe Sec. of Navy
Col. Ryan and the Unit head up DOD
wow, I have way to much free time.
I’ll second FW’s take (@16) on this surgeon general thing. Gupta is a real doctor, not that it matters too much in this position, given that it’s mainly about being a public face. Gupta already has experience with that, so he should do just fine. After all, name a successful former surgeon general, and guess what, you’ve named a celebrity! Name a surgeon general no one’s heard of, and they probably weren’t a terribly influential surgeon general.
That said, I still feel the pull to refer to him as C. Everett Gupta. (Perhaps he was the greatest celebrity surgeon general in my lifetime, though my wife didn’t even know who he was.)
As to celebrities, FW has already listed all the elected celebrities I could think of, and yes, most of them are Republicans. I’m sure Democrats have other examples besides Franken, though perhaps not as great celebrities as the GOP has attracted.
Still, the mocking (?) tone of this thread seems to miss the point that almost all we ever elect are celebrities. That’s why the imcumbency rate is so high — once we’ve actually heard of someone who got elected, we keep re-electing them!
That said, I can’t believe no one has recommended Carl Weathers for a post. And if you don’t know why, you don’t know your elected celebrities very well. Or your bad sci-fi action flicks. Perhaps he’d do well at Agriculture? “Add some broth, a potato … baby, you got a stew goin’!”
Most recent Dem Celebrity would be Congressman Heath Shuler, former Redskins and Saints quarterback.
FW & tODD, are you objecting to my lampooning of Republicans? I would think that you would appreciate that!
Where in this post is there anything about a liberal/conservative divide? I am following Barack Obama in being postpartisan. Maybe a celebritocracy is a way to accomplish that.
And yes, I am cognizant of the fact that Dr. Gupta is, in fact, a doctor, just as Judge Judy is a judge.
Bono ran for senator at some point? I must have missed that one. And he ran as a Republican??? Whoa! Talk about bizarro world!
Frank, that’s only because Democrats have their sense of humor surgically removed at birth. When’s the last time you heard of a funny elected Democrat? I am stumped.
As far as celebrity/unqualified/bizarre (though not funny) Democrats, how about Caroline Kennedy and Al Franken… wait you ruled him out. Oh, there’s Obama! Mustn’t forget him. And Bill Bradley (Senator), John Glenn (Senator), Ben Jones (“Crazy Cooter” from Dukes of Hazard – Representative), and the list goes on.
Technically, Fred T was a lawyer before he acted, so I’m not sure you should count him as unqualified, though just being a lawyer certainly doesn’t qualify a person either. Lots of people manage to practice law and go straight to a significant political post (ex: Ted Kennedy). That sucks, but it seems to be fairly normal.
Back on topic – I love the Carl Weathers suggestion! We should elect him because he was the black guy in Predator! That was hilarious!
How about Tom Cruise for head of CIA?
Anyone have any good ideas for Will Smith? It seems a shame to leave him out.
Ooh! Oo! Jim Carrey! There HAS to be something we could elect or appoint him to do!
Veith (@20), while I agree that this topic lends itself to the lampooning of Republicans (ala FW @16), you didn’t really do much of it yourself. You named Gupta, Franken, and (Carolyn) Kennedy, all recent and all Democrats. You also made an allusion to Schwarzenegger, without naming him. (Okay, you also named Thompson, but not as an example of the celebritocracy you were mocking, but rather as a jokey suggestion for it, even though that joke was already made, by his candidacy, during the recent election.) If I hadn’t been aware of the not-at-all-recent trend of Republican celebrity politicians, I wouldn’t have considered you were “lampooning Republicans” at all.
And the difference between Gupta and “Judy” is that one of them is qualified for his proposed position, no? Judge Judy is a judge? Fine, but is she Supreme Court caliber? Contrast that with the doctoral skills necessary to be Surgeon General.
Also, you’ve said before that you don’t do sarcasm, but I have a hard time reading “I am following Barack Obama in being postpartisan” as anything else. It reads like it’s soaked in the stuff.
And while I’ve never heard of Heath Shuler, I do thank WebMonk (@21) for reminding me about Bradley and Glenn (though, as I am no sports fan, I’d only ever heard of Bradley as a Senator and presidential candidate).
That said, “Democrats have their sense of humor surgically removed at birth. When’s the last time you heard of a funny elected Democrat?” I know lots of funny Democrats, with regard to your first (bizarre) claim. Just not a lot of elected ones. But that’s because I can’t think of any funny politicians, period. Can you? Even Franken has been generally unfunny in his attempt to get elected.
But yes, Weathers is the only person left in Predator’s cast (that I’ve heard of) that hasn’t held office. The acting coach on that set must have been rather inspirational.
Shatner and Carey are Canadian…. although I’m not 100% sure of their current citizenship.
But if you want the country to run well, and ignore citizenship/birth rules, my recommendation for sprucing things up is Chef Gordon Ramsay.
I can see it: A line of auto-exec’s & bankers being chewed-out by Ramsay .. priceless.
Democrat celebrity politicians include:
Helen Gahagan Douglas – U.S. Congress (starred on Broadway in the 1920s, and in the 1935 movie She with Randolph Scott.
Sheila Kuehl – California State Assembly, later the California Senate (played Zelda Gilroy in the long-running 1950s TV show The Many Loves of Dobie Gillis)
Let’s not forget Shirley Temple as another Republic celeb (though not elected).
Carl (@24), you and I have different definitions of “celebrity”.
Funny elected people – GW Bush! Of all the presidential Correspondent Dinner speeches I have ever watched, his were the only ones that I genuinely laughed during his jokes.
Obviously his jokes were written for him and all that, but Clinton fell flat in his speeches there. Obviously those aren’t necessarily reflections on their Presidential skills.
Schwarzenegger is still able to put out a good comedy spiel. Palin was horrible at intended comedy. McCain was so-so, but Obama truly sucked during the campaign (maybe he’ll loosen up now that he’s not campaigning). Reagan was hilarious, though his humor was pretty dry, not comedy-club style. Poor Biden was a laugh riot except when he tried. Bob Dole – worse than even Obama. Clinton (Bill) was WAY above average at impromptu humor, but his scripted humor always seemed to go splat. Anyone remember Perot? Comedic gold, unintentionally. Dukakis was good. Kerry stunk. Quayle was decent.
But the absolutely worst of all time: Al Gore. Hands down. No comparison. Not even Palin or Kerry can challenge him as the un-funniest politician.
Ok already Dr Veith! I am most sure you will appreciate Bob Hope´s take on democrats……
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RWpU8sX10_4
#27 webmonk
i agree. gw can be very funny and self depreciating. I thought reagan had his moments for the same reason…
(D) Jesse Ventura – former MN Governor/ex-wrestler – could be up for a role with The President’s Council on Physical Fitness and Sports.
I think Jesse Ventura was an Independent, not a Democrat.
Regardless, he certainly deserves to be included in any list of celebrities-to-politicians. He makes Schwarzenegger look like an heavy-weight professional politician.
Clint Eastwood – Homeland Security
BTW, it is Keifer Sutherland and not Sullivan.
I knew that, AJ. Thanks for catching it. I’ll change it. tODD, lighten up! Notice that I tagged this blog post as “humor.”
Also, celebrities are not just someone who is well-known, which, by definition, would include anyone who won an election. A celebrity, it has been said, is someone who is famous for being famous. A quick way to that is appearing on TV. I’m concerned that TV influence us too much. Would Dr. Gupta be tapped for this job unless he was a TV star? Yes, he’s a doctor, but so is my doctor. The surgeon general is not usually just any doctor.
But I’m getting too serious myself. I’m just playin’ here!
Sean Penn as Secretary of State.
We should be careful about electing anyone, celebrity or not; but celebrity in itself doesn’t disqualify anyone from holding elected office.
Before we complain about electing professional comedians, think about it: might they not do at least as well as some of the amateur clowns we have already elected?
Michael Jackson as chairman of the Federal Reserve.
Ben Stein for Secretary of Education.
I’m sorry, but I have to strongly disagree with the venerable WebMonk regarding his dismissal of the comedic value of Al Gore. Have you never seen his “global warming” schtick? Everywhere he goes to give speeches on global warming, below average temperatures seem to tag along. It’s a gas(!). The comedic timing is genius. I don’t know how he does it. And that’s not to even mention the strange and patronizing persona he assumes whenever he gives speeches to African-American audiences. If it wasn’t so offensive, it would be hilarious. Go see for yourself. It’s probably on YouTube somewhere. Comedians like Al Gore are born, not made.
On a serious note, I feel it is my civic duty to warn Dr. Veith that his Oklahoma Sooners are 12 hours away from getting TEBOWED!
Sarah Palin in the newly created office of “sentence structure and grammar” with Tina Fey as her deputy director.
to make it all easier, we can just use actors who played presidents in movies or tv shows… i liked harrison ford as the brave president in air force one and dennis haysbert from 24 as potential candidates…
funny story, i watched all of 24 season one in one long weekend (don’t ask why) and the next week saw a state farm ad with dennis haysbert in it and thought to myself, “when did we start letting the president of the united states make ads?” that was too much 24 for one weekend…